{Self Love}

want to know something I'm bad at? taking care of myself

and since becoming a mom I've been even worse at it.

so for sixteen months I've been
-not sleeping enough
-not eating well enough
-not drinking enough water
-not sweating enough
-not relaxing enough. 

and there's been a lot of guilt
-when I spend too much time working
-when I don't get enough work done
-when I forget to relax
-when I stay up too late
-when I skip a workout
-when I don't blog

that last one is silly, isn't it?

this isn't my first blog, this isn't even my third blog
and every time I seem to get overwhelmed,
or distracted,
and the posts become less frequent
and eventually they stop all together
and then I chug half a bottle of red wine and delete the entire thing

but I don't want that to happen again,
so I've been fighting a losing battle,
where I stay up too late,
trying to post something interesting
to engage what little audience may be there

but isn't this suppose to be fun?
and satisfying?
and enjoyable?
and feel like me
or like Val?

A Collaborative Effort is not going anywhere
but I am changing my attitude towards it
no apologies
no guilt
just posting what I want
when I want
and taking care of myself
and, of course, miss boo.

Xo,
K